I have to admit to a low-level of distress around this time.

All the media hype is high energy, people laughing, drinking and eating at parties, images of beautifully set tables and perfectly wrapped gifts under the tree. This is not what I see.

Folks are tired, stressed, worried about money, their jobs, being overbooked and under enthused. Baking, buying, worrying, lonely, drinking too much…..

I ask the rhetorical question… what happened?

People hesitate to wish you a Merry Christmas for fear of offending, The salutations stumble out like some contrived melting pot of political correctness. Then a faint smile, the kind that says “hehehe, I tried”, with shoulders shrugging, heels engaged for a quick turn.

This time of year is bittersweet. Things that make it really work for me are:

1. Family and friends. Solstice has just passed and I was so fortunate to spend the day and evening with family and friends. Main theme: conversation, companionship, and of course food. I know for some people food may not be high on the list of priorities, to me food is an expression of love and the sharing of a good meal trumps any gift.

2. Nature. This time of year the collective energy is so intense, that I find myself heading to nature. A simple hour walk down by the river, rejuvenates me.

3. Light. It may sound  trivial, but we are now being blessed with a daily gift of more light. The strings of lights adorning our homes during the holidays are beautiful to me.

4. Time. Once all the Christmas well wishing and celebrating has past, it’s time to pull up a chair by the winter fire and pull a book off the pile waiting to be read.

To all of you I wish the best of the season, however that looks for you.

Embrace what you need and let the rest go by the wayside.

The days have been flying by, I am completely immersed in studio time. The weather has been helpful, adding that warm winter glow that’s makes Christmas seem close. With coffee in hand I walk across the yard, open the door to my studio and the smell of clay awakens my senses. If you have never had the privilege of experiencing that smell. think wet clean earth.

The concentrated creative time is bliss, A pleasure I have taken for granted too many times. This year feels different. My work keeps me in the present. I find that the ideas are coming so fast and furious, a pen and paper have become my companion.

In 5 days, I will have the privilege to spend the day with Karen and Chris at Bluerock Gallery.  We will be  showing my work and catching up with all of you. After Saturday my work will remain in the gallery for sale. There will be new works and old favorites available.

Here is a sneak peek at some sculptural pieces I have been working on.

These houses are from a series I started working on back in our “Terra Cotta” days. I had put it on the shelf for a year. They kept calling to me. This is a theme that is very close to my heart these days.  The first image is one of the houses leather hard stage, the second image is one at finished stage.

There will also be many old favorites such as chili pepper salsa bowls, mixed media pieces, baking dishes, whimsical boxes and jewelery.

We look forward to seeing everyone on Saturday, Dec. 10th at Bluerock Gallery , 110 Centre Ave. Black Diamond. For more info: Bluerock Gallery

The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes but in having new eyes.

As I write, I realize I am unsure of how to articulate my thoughts from the last 6 months. I have been divinely guided in directions I couldn’t have imagined a year ago.

As I struggled to reinvent myself my world shifted and changed taking me with it. I have not traveled this journey alone.  My true love has been down walking beside me.

Our plans to leave everything behind for lands unknown have been put on hold to allow us to soften and grow in our own personal world view.

Summer brought us incredible joy, learning, and personal discovery. Many potlucks, dinners with friends, quiet times of  contemplation and most of all our journey into Permaculture.

Last spring I took an introductory course from Verge Permaculture, I went home that night and knew in my heart that I had found my calling. I immediately signed up for my Permaculture Design Certificate and  started reading everything I could get my hands on, attending workshops, talks and most of all applying the principles to my own life.  Actually I’m pretty obsessed. My kids roll their eyes when I start the composting chats, and the ongoing roll call of vegetables harvested that week.  The most valuable lesson I have learned is how important it is to have a sense of community. This summer has given us the opportunity to use our home to do just that.

This fall I am heading back to my clay studio with renewed vigor and excitement. Many ideas on the table, wet pots, clay ovenware, mixed media……. any whatever else inspires me.

As the season changes we settle in, content and full.

I have to admit I am enjoying the challenge of the work. At the beginning I had to monitor myself, to keep from just doing what needed to be done, to waiting to be told when to do it. I had to realize that everything had its own rhythm including how we as employees moved through our work day. In February when the greenhouses were just starting to house the seed packs, seeing the vision of opening day was so far away.

Once again…. chop wood, haul water, repeat, the meditation of the daily work is before me.

I am learning the value of hard work from the place of a worker but most importantly, I am learning humility. The ability to take orders and complete tasks that are not of my own thinking and way of doing things, but by understanding that there are others ways to do it.

I am learning to be patient with process and that not everyone is interested in my opinion. We are in full swing at the greenhouses and I patiently wait for “baby Awesome” to be born .(my first grandbaby)

Below is a TED talk that I feel really captures the essence of work.

Ted Talk, Mike Rowe celebrates Dirty Work

I have 2 children, both very different but each teachers in their own way. One child was born with a disability. We were always uncomfortable with that label for she was never unable or unwilling. At the age of three we were given a choice. To label her and create a world that focused around her difference or to integrate her into our world. We choose to believe that she deserved to live in a world where she was looked at first as a person not her disability. Many people never noticed her hearing challenge. She played with other children. When words were not there they created their own communication. She connected with the animal world,enjoying the wordless communication.

This choice did not come without its share of hardships but mostly it created challenges to be triumphed and moments of compassion and understanding.

Our next child was the fiery one. She taught us to stand up and be heard! From a tender age she spoke up against injustice and became her sister’s constant companion. She learned to be her sister’s ears in the early years and now compassion comes easily to her.

As  I watch my children as adults, I feel the pulling away. The unfolding of their own lives and I am grateful for the lessons they have taught me.

Let’s never discount the ability of our children to be our teachers, most of all let’s be thankful.

I would like to share this “TED” talk with you. It reminded me so much of that fiery spirit that graces difference.

Caroline Casey

Here is a couple of floaters for you………………………….

“I believe that the power of music is being felt in places we never imagined.  This project started Ten Years ago in a subway station with two monks singing and playing guitar.  To this day I cannot tell you where they where from or what language they where singing in.  I am starting to believe that this is meant to be, as they serve as a symbol that regardless of who we are or where we come from we are all united with music.” Playing for change

Ok, I know this is longish, but relevant. It spoke to me, actually directly to me, giving me goosebumps. This is the introduction to “The Alchemist” by Paulo Coelho

“We all need to be aware of our personal calling.Whenever we do that fills us with enthusiasm, we are following our legend. However, we don’t all have the courage to confront our own dream. Why?

There are four obstacles:

First obstacle: we are told from childhood onward that everything we want to do is impossible. We grow up with this idea as the years accumulate, so too do the layers of prejudice,fear and guilt. There comes a time when our personal calling is so deeply buried in our soul as to be invisible. But it’s still there.

Second obstacle: We know what we want to do, but are afraid of hurting those around us by abandoning everything in order to pursue our dream. We do not realize that love is further impetus, not something that will prevent us going forward. We do not realize that those who genuinely wish us well want us to happy and are prepared to accompany us on that journey.

Third obstacle: Once we have accepted that love is a stimulus, we come up against the third obstacle: fear of the defeats we will meet on the path. We who fight for our dream suffer far more when it doesn’t work out, because we cannot fall back on the old excuse: “oh well I didn’t really want it anyway” We do want it and know that we have staked everything on it and the path of the personal calling is no easier than any other path, except our whole heart is in this journey. Then, we must be prepared to have patience in difficult times and to know the universe is conspiring in our favor, even though we may not understand how. Are defeats necessary? Necessary or not, they happen. When we first begin fighting for our dream, we have no experience and make many mistakes. The secret of life  is to fall down seven times and get up eight.

So why is it so important to live our personal calling if we are only going to suffer more than other people? Because once we overcome the defeats…. and we always do…… we are filled we a greater sense of euphoria and confidence. In the silence of our hearts, we know that we are proving ourselves worthy of the miracle of life. Intense unexpected suffering passes more quickly than suffering that is apparently bearable; the later goes on for years and without our noticing eats away our soul, until one day, we are no longer able to free ourselves from the bitterness and it stays with us for the rest of our lives.

Having disinterred our dream, having used the power of love to nurture it and spent many years living with the scars, we suddenly notice that what we always wanted is there, waiting for us, perhaps the very next day.

Forth obstacle: the fear of realizing the dream for which we fought all our lives. The mere possibility of getting what we want fills the soul of the ordinary person with guilt. We look around at all those who have failed to get what they want and feel that we do not deserve to get what we want either. We forget about all the obstacles we overcame, all the suffering we endured, all the things we had to give up in order to get this far. I have known a lot of people who, when their personal calling was within their grasp, went on to commit a series of stupid mistakes and never reached their goal… when it was only a step away.

This is the most dangerous of obstacles because it has a kind of saintly aura about it: renouncing joy and conquest. But if you believe you are worthy of the thing you fought so hard to get, you become an instrument of god and help the soul of the world, and mostly you understand why you are here. Paulo Coelho, Rio de Janerio, November 2002.

Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist ……….. follow the omens.

Missing the Boat

It is not so much that the boat passed and you failed to notice it.
It is more like the boat stopping directly outside your bedroom window,
the captain blowing the signal-horn, the band playing a rousing march.
The boat shouted, waving bright flags, its silver hull blinding in the sunlight.

But you had this idea you were going by train. You kept checking the time-table, digging for tracks. And the boat got tired of you, so tired it pulled up the anchor and raised the ramp.
The boat bobbed into the distance, shrinking like a toy–at which point you probably realized
you had always loved the sea.

Naomi Shihab Nye Different Ways to Pray- Breitenbush Publications, 1980

This post was written 3 days ago, while I was on a digital sabbatical. Ok, Ok I cheated, a little!

“To except the unacceptable is the greatest grace of all”

From the movie ” Calling it Quits“

Woke up this morning, the thermometer read -40C ! The sun was kissing the horizon , I opened the door the cats ran the other way. A burst of steamy cold air rushed in. Me and 34 animals, a digital sabbatical, a stack of articles and podcasts to make my way through. Most of all, some stuff to work on. You know the stuff I’m talking about…… The” I need some space and silence and to allow the engine to slow’. Time to move from human doing to human being.

What filled my brain space the most was my struggle with authenticity. I plugged my ipod into my ears, grabbed 5 dogs and headed out to the prairie to walk and listen to Brene’ Brown‘s book, “The Gifts of Imperfection“.  At one point I lay in the snow, asking myself “Why can’t I just cruise through life like everyone else?” Am I the only one in my circle of friends who has a plate full of shit in front of them?No… change that, I have a buffet, and it’s not the good stuff like my mom’s fried chicken, it’s left overs, from a life of just moving forward, moving forward and not reflecting.

As women we are master’s of illusion, till the crack appears, that’s where the light gets in. ( Thanks Lenard Cohen) OMG we can be happy sweet little things, can’t we? I want to shift from sweet to real with a side of kindness to myself and others.

This is my art theme for February, to explore all the aspects of authenticity. Not the syrupy sweet cliche’ authenticity, but the meat and potatoes. The things that block our way  and how we can shift them.

So I won’t be sharing long winded diatribes regarding my struggle, but my productive looking, examining, moving in a new direction,  my quest to move from Human doing to Human being.

This is my new modus operandi:
Move the energy before you make a move for the results.
Want to write a killer chapter? Take a bath.
Want the check to arrive? Give some money away.
Want the love to come? Dance it out in your living room.
Want to slam down your to do list? Take the day off.
It’s not always a doing.
It’s a new seeing.
And people see you back.

Thanks to  Danielle at White Hot Truth for this inspiring list.

Evonne